Friday, July 4, 2008

Top 10 US Soldiers' Pastimes

Compiled by Dexter Mejia (

10. Put up a MySpace profile so they can collect names of people they will fuck upon returning to the US.

9. Sell guns and ammos to the enemies.

8. Get drunk on camp and pick fights with comrades.

7. Shoot comrades they had a fight with and report them as "killed in action".

6. Douse prisoners with buckets of water while they hang almost upside down and tell everyone that it is not a torture.

5. Get dogs to bite naked prisoners and tell everyone that their supervisor ordered them to do it.

4. Rape exotic women and get stationed to another base where there are more exotic women. Woohoo!

3. Treat local animals like shooting target practices.

2. Treat local kids like shooting target practices and tell local authorities that the kids looked like local animals.

1. Smile everytime an American (especially a presidential candidate) says they are modern heroes.

No comments: